Happy World Autism Awareness Day!
I don’t know why, but this is a difficult blog entry for me to write. Not because I am sad, or because this is a painful topic. No, that’s not it at all. I think it is because we have had autism in our lives for 5 years now, and I am finding it hard to pick just a few points out of those 1951 days to present on this day of awareness.
You see, autism has not been consistent for us. A few years ago, I may have written something about how Jason doesn’t fall within the stereotypical “norms” for autism. He loved loud noises, transitioned easily, and was extremely social. These days, I often find Jason covering his ears when too many different sounds are happening at once, and my once fluid child has become much more rigid with activities.
A few months ago, Jason’s anxiety was so bad that I was fearful to leave the house with him. Today, he is happy and calm and I haven’t heard him scream in weeks. Stims come and go, and fixations can vary month to month.
Perhaps that is the awareness that I can spread today…that autism does not fit into a tidy box complete with a list of everything included. I have learned to throw out that parts list, and let Jason lead us in our journey.
I often get asked where Jason is on the spectrum. Is he high functioning, low functioning, or somewhere in between? In my experience, people like clean and definitive answers. We want to know if we can sort Jason into the red, blue, or yellow box, and then file that knowledge away and never expect it to change. It is not nearly that simple, though. If you asked me today, I would say that his language skills put him somewhere in the middle, but his repetitive behaviours and need to stim would put him on the low end. To make things more complicated, his cognitive skills place him in the higher functioning category. I would finish that assessment by saying that it could all change again in a few months.
Autism can look entirely different from 1 year to the next, or even minute to minute. We modify supports and lesson plans based on what Jason needs on a regular basis. We see the pediatrician every few months to assess his medication regime. We play Bubble Guppies on repeat until one day he will only watch Peppa Pig.
Learning to ride the autism wave was not easy for me. I like routine. I like color coded and organized boxes. I DO NOT like change. But I love my son with every fibre of my being so I am learning to surf that wave like a pro (alright, I’m done with the metaphors).
So, happy World Autism Awareness Day, everyone! I hope I have been able to shine a tiny light (oops, I like metaphors) onto a facet of autism in our lives. Here’s to another year, and another day of change!
